3 Wierd Dreams



1) I'm in my room (the room I live in now; my subconcious has finally caught up to the present) looking at my bed from my chair. A huge spider with furry legs at the foot of the bed is approaching another smaller spider which is on my pillow. The bed is made and the blankets on top are yellow (both things never true). The large spider speeds up its approach as it gets closer to a sprint when it climbs the pillow. I see the spiders fucking and I feel no fear. Later the spiders disapear and I ask aloud "where's the big spider" my father's voice answers "probably getting eaten by the little one." I don't see my father and I don't expect to. I start to see a stream of baby spiders coming out from under the bed and I decide it's time to do something about these spiders. In dreams as well as reality, I hate sqashing spiders; I opt for chemical warfare. I get a can of Raid Wasp and Hornet killer and start squirting it in little holes in my bed. I shoot at spiders and hunt for the source of the spiders until I wake. Actually, it isn't me doing the Raid shooting, it's my dad; but it's more like a ghost is doing the Spider Hunt, because I don't see the shape of his body as he kills spiders. It's more like there is this ethereal presence doing the killing at my command from the chair on the other side of the room; my Golem doing the work I'm afraid to do for me.



I have no idea what this dream means. I remember feeling very calm upon waking from it.



2)As often happens in my dreams, they start off in West Quad; the dormitory I stayed at durring my Sophmore year at the University of Michigan. This was a particularly bad year for me regarding the progress of my mental illness; I was being perscribed an increasingly heavy dose of tricyclic antidepressants along with Lithium which gave me an awful hand tremor. I was also drinking and smoking pot. The lithium didn't do much for controlling my mood swings, and the antidepressants (as well as the weed) was fueling my ups and downs. Anyway, it was a rough time for me, and maybe that's why so many of my dreams start off in that dorm room 12 years ago.



This time, my roommate (the roommate always changes) was a guy I lived with for about a year in 1998, right after I broke up with Deborah Huff and when I started having an increasingly spastic gait (later to be discovered to be cervical stenosis). This guy was a professional tree trimmer. He was also a Rush Limbaugh dittohead, who had on his desk a plaque certifying him as a graduate of Limbaugh's Academy of Conservative Studies. He had 3 kids who lived in Waco, about 100 miles North of Austin. He didn't see them very much. He owned a blue Suburban and towed behind it a large trailer. I remember him getting very upset when there were food stains on his microwave that he had in the kitchen, leaving a note on the fridge expressing his displeasure.



I remember we were at the Briarwood mall in Ann Arbor, Michigan, shopping for clothes. We weren't walking thru the store, more like gliding thru it as if our feet had rollerblades on them. Then we were in his truck. I became adjitated and frightened when I realized that we weren't heading back to the dorm, but were heading out into the country. A police car pulled us over and I remember telling the officer that my roommate was kidnapping me and that I needed help. That's when I woke up.



I don't have a clue about this one either.



3) Perhaps the wierdest of the dreams. I don't know when or where it was supposed to have been, maybe the present maybe the past. I had 7 black and white colored boxes from Urban Outfitters all stacked vertically in the corner of my room. I started to open the boxes and throw the contents of the boxes onto the floor. Instead of clothes, brightly colored toys came out, including a ball with suction cups on the outside of it about a foot across; when you shook the ball it made a strange sound that I can't remember but wish I could. Justin Yunke was in the dream. Justin was in a band I played in between 93 and 94 called Violet Wine. He was the drummer. He was a very crafty guy, building a switch panel to power our lightbar and hooking it up to a sensor on his kick drum so that the lights would change with the tempo of our songs. Anyway, the plan was to decorate the cieling of my room with the brightly colored Urban Outfitters toys, and I asked Justin, who had just finished doing the same thing, what was the best way to hang things from the cieling. He told me to use a staple gun or thumb tacks.